I have this woman in my office, and I tell you, not one day passes without her complaining about something. When I see her name pop up in my inbox, I proceed to the kitchen, make a cup of tea, return to my desk, take up the ‘brace position’ and get ready for a crash landing. You know, there are just people in every office that are difficult to deal with (even in my awesome work space!) Usually, they’re not specifically targeting you, they’re just like that. Why I always am the one who works with them, I just don’t know.
Sometimes I think that it’s a superiority thing. Some people intentionally try to make others feel like a failure in order to elevate their own status. Luckily I don’t know many people who behave this way. When my boss, Natalie Maroun nails me for something (and I’m not talking the pretty kind that nail that you paint!), I know it’s because she expects perfection. Even though she’s tough and has high expectations, she is very careful with her word choice (unless you’ve unleashed chaos into the business and deserve a whipping) ensuring that you understand what is wrong, why, and what the expectation is.
When people complain and don’t show you details and evidence, it’s very challenging to fully understand what the problem is. So when accepting a complaint, or making one, include or ask for the facts and details of what is wrong. This is easy when you bought a pair of hot kitten heels and the tip’s broken off in the first wearing. You can simply pop back to the shop with the broken ‘new’ shoe as ‘exhibit A’, receipt in hand as ‘exhibit B’ and anger on your face, just for added emphasis.
But when you’ve found yourself in a tricky situation with a colleague that you like over something important that’s being done incorrectly, it becomes a whole new challenge. It’s even more complicated when that person is in a higher position than you are. At my company we have a philosophy of ‘brutal facts’. It sounds harsh, but it’s really not. It means speaking the truth and showing the evidence while always remaining focussed on a positive result. Essentially, it calls for putting the situation and the challenge on a different level to personal relationships and sorting it out honestly, sensitively and openly with no regrets or name calling.
Brutal Facts needs a level of maturity though, and if your colleague is just too sensitive to deal with honesty they’re going to hurt. Am I suggesting you back off and allow the incorrect action to continue happening? Absolutely not! If you approach people with the right intention, with careful words and a gentle heart, you are doing the right thing. If the person behaves negatively, that is their choice and reflects on their ethics and values.
At the end of the day High Heelers are striving for perfection. We were born to keep climbing. So we can’t accept anything below average and we need to reject inefficiency (in the right way). This week we stand with you as you have the awkward conversations that will improve your workplace for the better so you can all climb together. Good luck!
Cheers,
Jo
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