I had yet another magical weekend this week. Since I learnt last week how important it is to spend time with special people, I’ve been putting the lesson to practice. I tell you what High Heelers – I’ve had no regrets. Not one! The only thing I’ve lost out on is sleep – and there’s always more of that to be had (as precious as it is). I once read that in your twenties you leave your home and in your thirties you return. The theory was about how when you’re in your young adult years you’re out discovering who you are, establishing boundaries by pushing them and figuring out your values by testing them. Then in your thirties you’ve settled down, you’re having kids and you’re building your own home, and in doing so you reconnect with family and your own past.
That may be true for many. In fact, it’s true for whole generations that came before us. But in today’s modern world I’m finding that such rules no longer apply. We have the freedom to abandon rules and make our own. Right now, I’ve decided that I’m rediscovering my twenties – just with more perspective and an extra sprinkling of wisdom that I definitely didn’t have back then. I spent my early adulthood building a relationship, nesting and structuring a strong value system and moral compass that I thought would guide me into the future. I was so grown up, so mature… and so unfun (which is now officially a word). From the age of around 24, I didn’t party till ‘stupid o’clock’ in the morning like my friends did, I didn’t indulge in different foods and drinks, I didn’t become friends with people completely unlike me who could bring a new lens to my world. I didn’t do any of those things. Nope. I lived in the confines that I built for myself. I still don’t know why I built them so high.
I’m beginning to learn as I grow up, that growing up is, at times, best done backwards – as in growing down. It’s about accepting yourself for who you are, like you did when you were a youngling. Being brave enough to do things you wouldn’t usually. But being wise enough to know where your boundaries are and what your truth is. It’s understanding that when calculating risk, you must look beyond economic gain, stability, structure and long-term investment, but to also see the investments we make in experience, in love, in friendship, in happiness and in making a difference beyond our own sphere. The world is as enormous as its geography, yet as small as the internet that connects us. We are surrounded by opportunity like never before.
This week let’s be all about dreams. May I suggest you connect with yours? Dreams are funny things. They’re sometimes so clear you don’t believe you could ever forget or ignore them, but as times passes and your priorities change, that’s exactly what you end up doing. Spend a moment to reflect on your deepest desires. What did you want to do when you were young? Did you want to give back to society through children? Do it. Find a kiddies’ home that needs support in your area and volunteer your time. Volunteer your love. Did you dream of being a doctor so you could care for people, and you somehow found your way into finance? That’s ok. Visit oncology patients, offer them some of your best time and quality listening skills. Connect with an organisation like “Reach for a Dream’ – and reach for yours.
What I’m starting to learn as I’m learning to grow down, is that you’re never too old to realise your dreams. Never. We don’t need to follow the impractical plan we had when we were twelve, we have a globe of options available. Use your time. Use your resources. Share your heart. It will make a difference to you. And it will make a difference to those you connect with.
So as I sit in reflection catching dreams like butterflies in my hands (they tickle a little, I must warn you) may I encourage you to grab hold of yours too? And when you catch them, hang onto them. They’re flighty little things and can easily flap away and make you lose your breath. Catch them. Keep them close. And put them to action. Breathe. You were made for this world and this time, and it was made for you. Make your difference. Be yourself. Be unique. Leave your legacy.
Have a wonderful week.
Yours in heels,
Jo
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